The Last Bag of Milk

This post brings a whole slew of emotions. This is the last bag of momma's milk. You made it 14 months with some sort of momma's milk every day (nursing or pumped). My dream goal had been 12 months, so I'm quite proud of that stat. 

Why nursing was best for me: I'd always known I wanted to breast feed my children. As the saying goes "Breast is Best." It's common knowledge that breastfeeding reduces ear infections, the chance for asthma, decreases allergies, the risk of SIDS, even some forms of cancer and the list goes on. I'm all about prevention and good health, so I was bound and determined to nurse you for one year. It was something I was really excited about. Call me naive, but I thought this would be a slam dunk (unless I had production issues). Yeah, about that...Nursing an infant is just plain hard. Things I wish I'd known before you arrived and struggles: 1. Nursing isn't quite as natural and easy as you are lead to believe. There's an art to it. I felt like a failure many times in the beginning and worked extensively with a lactation consultant until we were able to jive better. I was lucky, you latched from the beginning. And, although you latched, you just latched too well and not properly. This lead to many painful and frustrating nursing sessions. Thank goodness Medela and Lansinoh have phenomenal products on the market to help with this. 2. It is extremely important to have a good support system in place. Your dad, grandmother, aunt and Mrs. Amanda were crucial in my decision to keep on trucking. Call it dumb luck that my best friend and sister-in-law both had babies your age and decided to nurse. I'm thankful it happened that way! There are so many points in time where I wanted to throw in the towel and the encouragement and support pulled me through. 3. Nursing is really tough on the body. Who knew?? I just figured your body produced milk, no problem. My OB recently told me that nursing is actually harder on the body than the pregnancy itself. Now, everyone is different, but in my case I can totally see where he's coming from. I have dealt with everything from mastitis and recurring clogged ducts to dizziness and hypoglycemic incidences. Nursing demands so much from the body.... not just the mere extra calories you need to consume. 4. Nursing demands a lot time, especially in the beginning. It took me a while to build up any sort of supply for you to live on in case I needed to be away or if an emergency came up. One example to this, I caught a stomach bug when you were 3 months old. Thankfully, I was with family that could help out and take care of you. You still needed to eat and I didn't have a milk supply built up yet, so I literally pumped (while completely nauseous, and handed down bottles of milk to my mom to feed you. Another example, Daddy and I were gone for 4 days when you were 10 months old. At that time, you still nursed 3 times a day. For some reason, my body decided to reject the pump (I never let down) and ended up hand expressing milk to keep my supply up and keep me from being engorged. Nursing is a labor of love! The Joys: I don't want to paint a negative picture of nursing. It was a wonderful experience for both of us. It provided us with a special bonding time. When you were a little older, it allowed me to hold you and cradle you when you'd otherwise be squirmy and on the move. It created wonderful memories. You used to get so excited to nurse that you literally opened your mouth and made the sweetest sound of "I can't wait, I can't wait!" when you'd latch you'd close your eyes and then smile. I knew it comforted you. Speaking of comfort, nursing did help out TREMENDOUSLY in times you were stressed. For example, we were on a plane and NOTHING would calm you down. After about 15-30 minutes of screaming I finally let you latch on and you immediately calmed down and fell asleep. I had already offered you a bottle of pumped milk, but you refused. You wanted mama! In the end: I loved nursing you and will totally do it again when your brother or sister comes along. It provided you with numerous benefits and allowed us to share a special bond. I was just clueless going into it.